Last night was a crazy night. Over the last two days I reintroduced cauliflower into my diet. I’d removed it early on in Baby’s life because it made us both a little gassy. It turns out, it still does. Ugh.
So baby went to bed slightly later than usual (just before 9 I think) and spent much of the night wiggling and whining in her sleep trying to get the gas out. Poor thing! At one point it got so bad she actually staring crying in her sleep.
My poor little sweetheart … crying! In her sleep! What was a momma to do?!?
I picked her up, that’s what I did. And I held her in my arms and proceeded to walk around our little apartment, bouncing and soothing her. Thankfully, she stayed asleep and dropped the whining and wiggling and crying while she was in my arms.
And all I could think, while walking around my apartment in the dark at 2:30am in the morning with my almost 19 lb baby in my arms, was …
I hope I never forget these moments.
I never want to forget how perfect she fits in the crook of my arm with her head on my shoulder, arms relaxed and draped over mine.
I never want to forget how much I love her smell, even with the day’s milk and drool dried on her skin and her hair rich with coconut oil.
I never want to forget this place. This beautiful home that held me as I birthed my child within its strong walls.
These wonderful nights, when I’m awoken over and over by the sound of a snuggling little girl chirping to be fed.
These long and unpredictable days that keep me off balance, but also keep fully focused on the present moment.
Her sounds. Her wonderful sounds. Whispers. Baby words. Squeals. Screams. Cries. Shouts. Grunts. I love them all. Each one reminds me to stand in awe of this new young life, and all the goodness I’m blessed to live.
So I held her and held her and prayed for these moments to never leave my memories.
And then I put her down. I laid her back down on the bed next to me and she lay quiet for only a few minutes until she started crying again. *sigh*
This time, even though I usually take the parenting night shift so Hubby has enough energy to get him through entire days with baby awake, I woke my husband to ask him to get her homeopathic colic medicine to ease the gas pains.
His response when he first awoke? “What can I help with?”
Yeah, cuz he’s that awesome. Seriously. So he gets her medicine and while I do my best to feed it to her without waking her, I fail. She wakes up. It’s now almost 4am and we’re all awake. What the heck do we do? Baby almost never wakes at night. This is a rare occasion!
It’s amazing the feeling of peace that comes over you in the middle of the night when your whole family’s awake at an odd hour and you just know that what’s happening, though strange, is unfolding perfectly.
So we decide to have a dance party! Not at first, of course. At first, Hubby takes Baby into the living room so I can squeeze in a bit of sleep before dawn arrived. But she fusses and cries and I can hear her discontent so I get up and join my two great loves.
THEN we have a dance party! Low lights. Good music. Lots of booty-wiggling at 4:30am. Yes! This is exactly how you get your baby back to sleep in the middle of the night.
Not really. It fails. She stays awake. When it’s finally time to nurse her again I try with the hope that she’ll fall asleep (as she usually does). No luck. Still awake. So Hubby, fantastic man that he is, wraps her to him in our woven wrap (like this one) and putts around the house until she’s finally asleep. Then what does he do next? He keeps her on him as he sleeps so I can get some worry free rest, sprawling out on the bed without fear of smooshing baby.
4:30am dance party? Delicious sleep? Life is good. All that was missing was the 5am run to the taco place on the corner with the bangin carnitas.